Life, it truly can be like a roller coaster. One moment, you are riding high, the next, you’ve dropped and your stomach feels like it’s twisted up in knots inside.
2017 has been just that for me. Because of so much unknown in the area of where I will be living, it’s affected me in many ways. The biggest way is in my eating and how well I can control my health. It’s an emotional thing, there’s just something about food that can be comforting.
When I found out back in March that I would be running the NYC Marathon again, I set a plan for myself to get back to the weight I was when I trained for, and ran the 2015 NYC Marathon. That plan has proved to be quite the challenge. It may even be more challenging than training for the marathon itself is.
This year’s life struggles have proved to be hard on me emotionally. That unfortunately has led to a lot of ups and downs with my nutrition. I have done well for a few weeks, then fallen off the wagon and had a day where I ate too much. Of course, I always felt bad after the fact. I always feel guilty when I can’t keep on my allotted calorie count for the day.
The one good thing is, my fitness has remained right on target. I have never wavered on my 5-6 days a week of workouts. I run three days a week, and do cross-training two to three other days. Because of that commitment, I have been able to maintain the weight. No weight gain, just no weight loss happening unfortunately.
I really do want to get back down to the weight I was in 2015. I strive to reach that goal at some point. But, at the same time, I’m doing my best not to beat myself up over my hard time with losing it right now. I tell myself, I may not be where I want to be, but I’m not where I once was. Never will I go back to the weight I was before I got healthier and fit before mid-2009. Will NEVER happen, I am determined to never return to that.
Another thing I’ve started to do lately is separate myself from my scale. I used to weigh myself religiously every week, if not twice a week. Now, I weigh myself like twice a month. While I still want to see a lower number on the scale, it’s not all that matters for a healthy, fit life. How I feel and fit into my clothes is also a big factor. Some days, I feel good, and other days I don’t. That’s how I know that it’s still a work in progress, I’m still a work in progress. But, in the end, we always kind of are. The journey never really ends.
I’m striving to use the remaining time between now and the marathon to remember that big goal is what I’m aiming for. There are 84 days until the big dance in NYC. While I can’t promise I won’t have my slip ups (no such thing as perfect), I’m putting my eyes on the prize. I want to be the strongest, healthiest and fittest me when I stand upon that Verrazzano Bridge. There is time to better myself.
To accomplish this, I am putting it out there that I’m an emotional eater, and this year has tested that for me. It’s important to know both your strengths and weaknesses. I know what I need to do to reach my best, and that’s a part of the battle of losing weight and a healthy life. I know that I need to track my calories every single day to succeed. It’s been a method that helped me lose 80lbs, and it will work again.
What has also helped me is a support group. I’m re-discovering that in the From Fat to Finish Line community. Having just seen this awesome documentary last week, I feel inspired. Knowing they have such a great community online on Facebook had me joining yesterday. We all need support, and I can’t wait to get to know the community of amazing folks!